“Bwaaa! He’s coming! Everybody run!” screamed Bumper Badger as a pig-faced spaceship came soaring down towards Timber Island. Timber Tiger came running out of his home to see what the commotion was all about and was then utterly shocked when a blast from the spaceship blew his home to pieces. That sent Timber into a running frenzy to reach the safety of Taj Mountain, where lived Taj the blue elephant genie.
Timber managed to reach Bumper Badger, Pipsy Mouse, Krunch Kremling, and the rest of the racing gang safely, but reaching Taj Mountain itself would be no easy task; especially with a spaceship constantly firing blasts at the poor animals! The path ahead–at least the one they were being forced to take–consisted of rocky terrain that made travelling utterly difficult. But onward they went, hoping that by some miracle they would all reach Taj Mountain safe and sound. That miracle soon came.
From the very top of Taj Mountain, Taj himself came soaring down on his magical red carpet to aid his friends in need. His timeing couldn’t have been more perfect. Just as a blast was fired from the spaceship that would made fried chicken out of Drumstick, Taj reached his friends and retaliated with a ball of blue light that deflected the blast back into the spaceship. The spaceship sputtered and began to smoke as it crashed on the central area of Timber Island. The door to the spaceship opened wide and out stepped the evil space swine who had tormented the island years ago… Wizpig!
Wizpig watched the island inhabitants swarm up the mountain into the home of Taj, a cave filled with various instruments that the elephant used for his magic. But none of that could withstand the might of the great Wizpig. And the evil pig knew it.
“It’s so nice to see you all again, worms! I’ve come back to seek my revenge on this island for casting me onto that dreadful planet. It took years for my spaceship to read the coordinates correctly, but that gave me time to build up my rage for you pathetic little worms. And now the day of your doom has come! Ha ha ha ha ha!”
“What are we going to do, Timber? You’re parents are on vacation again and Diddy can’t be reached in time because he’s out on a new quest with Donkey and Dixie,” Pipsy squealed. Timber looked at her with an obvious frown of dissapointment. He didn’t know what to do either. It was Diddy that had saved the island those years ago by defeating Wizpig in a race, but with the Kong away on an adventure of his own, what were they to do?
“Come on friends. I’ve got an idea for you! Why not use Squawks to call Banjo? Perhaps he can help. He has gotten quite strong as the tales say,” suggested Taj, enlightening the bunch with hope. Timber showed the fondness of the idea by quickly scribbling a letter asking for help and then attaching it to Squawks’ foot. The messenger parrot then wasted no time to soar out of the cave in hopes of reaching Spiral Mountain before it was too late.
The wind outside ruffled the parrot’s feathers as he soared faster than ever before. The lush environment below him was but a blur. With his friends in trouble, this remarkable speed was absolutely necessary if he were to reach Banjo before Wizpig destroyed the island and made piglets out of its inhabitants. But he didn’t have to worry. Spiral Mountain was just ahead and he could already see the little blue home. He began to swoop down to land safely in front of the door when something yellow crashed into him. Down Squawks and this unknown flying object fell, crashing onto bright green grass surrounding the Spiral Mountain moat. The impact of the crash knocked the poor parrot out cold, but the other mysterious figure seemed to be okay. It stood to its feet and immediately noticed the note tied around Squawks’ foot and removed it. After reading it, the figure tucked it under its left wing and strolled over to Banjo’s house and knocked on the door.
“Brrreeee! My newest edition of Bird Seed from Beyond Magazine must be here! Hee hee!” squawked Kazooie as she dashed to the door. She had been waiting for this edition for the past two weeks. For some reason the carrier parrots were all having incidents when flying over Spiral Mountain while trying to deliver the mail. The only clue had ever been ‘A mysterious UFYB (Unidentified Flying Yellow Blur)’, but apparantly the problem had now been resolved. Or so Kazooie had hoped. When she opened that front door, the answer came to her quite clearly.
“Squaaaw! YOU! Where’s my magazine?!” Kazooie screamed quite loudly and prepared to fire an egg. Banjo rushed to the door and stopped Kazooie before she could fire upon the visitor.
“Guh-huh! Good to see you again, Canary Mary!” Banjo stated. “So what brings you here?”
“I have a special delivery for you. Sounds urgent. It’s tucked under my left wing here. I was thinking of wedging it up my…” started Canary Mary, but was cut short by a very outraged breegull.
“Spare us the details. Now where’s my magazine!?” demanded Kazooie once again.
“I’m sorry Kazooie. But I’ve been running short on paper and Loggo was sick of being clogged up with feathers. So I’ve had no choice but to resort to stealing mail from the parrots. If it helps, your magazine was the most comfortable paper of all!”
“Why you cheeky little…”
“Gulp! Kazooie! Timber and his island are in big trouble! Wizpig is back!” interrupted the bear, worried over the fate of his friends. He didn’t hesitate to grab the blue backpack from the rack. Kazooie was just about to rat-tat-rap Canary Mary’s yellow hide when she was suddenly snatched up and thrown inside the backpack. A few moments later, they were both atop Spiral Mountain standing on the Flight Pad where Kazooie launched themselves high into the air and took flight to Timber Island.
“Come out, come out little worms. Wizpig wants to play. Ha ha ha ha!” Wizpig still had the helpless animals trapped inside of the cave. It had been hours since Squawks was sent with the message for Banjo and they were beginning to wonder if the evil pig from space may have saw the bird and destroyed it. But they had no choice but to hope for Banjo’s aid. That’s the only chance they had. Wizpig was an extremely volatile enemy, one that none of them could possibly dream to stand up against. And now, with the pig standing so close to the cave, they were wondering if Banjo could possibly stand up against him either. But they soon had their answer when a sudden green spherical object knelled Wizpig in the head and exploded on impact. They had no idea what had happened until they heard a very familiar sound: “Guh huh!” Banjo had arrived!
“Take that, piggy!” declared Kazooie happily as Wizpig tumbled down the mountainside to land right next to his spaceship. Banjo and Kazooie landed safely next to the pig thinking the battle to be over. They couldn’t have been more wrong. Wizpig jumped to his feet and kicked the duo smack into a rock.
“Ha ha ha ha! You can’t beat me!” laughed the pig, prepared to end this battle so he can return to Taj Mountain and finish the inhabitants off once-and-for-all. Only then could he reign as true king of Timber Island. But he underestimated the true potential of the duo he was facing. A duo that has fought together through many battles for years and were determined to continue to do so for many more years to come. It was time to show Wizpig who’s boss.
Banjo stood to his feet and Kazooie raised her head up above her partner’s. They both stared the evil swine in the eyes and proved that they would not be defeated. “Oink Oink, fatty!” shrilled Kazooie and fired an Ice Egg followed by two Grenade Eggs. Wizpig was frozen in place and his eyes bulged when the grenade eggs slammed into him. The impact of the first shattered the icy wall, but the second nearly made him stumble over in pain. He gazed down to see the bear and bird nearly right under him and brought a heavy foot down meaning to flatten the two. Banjo luckily saw the impending doom falling fast above him and quickly rolled beneath the pig monstrosity’s legs. Now he was behind the evil pig and Kazooie saw the perfect opening for an attack. She instructed her partner to jump, and when he did she rat-a-tat-rapped the swine right on the hiney. Wizpig grabbed his butt in pain and bounced high into the air. The sudden impact when he crashed back onto the earth caused a minor earthquake that swept the duo off their feet.
Wizpig didn’t let that opportunity pass him by and was back on the offensive. He snatched the duo up into one of his hands and began to squeeze the life out of them. Banjo and Kazooie’s faces began to change colors as the blood stopped flowing through their veins. Their bodies were becoming numb and their lungs were nearly sucked dry of air. But the sudden sound of an airplane caused the pig’s grip to loosen and then they were lying on the ground, nearly unconcious. All they could do is simply watch as airplane after airplane came flying out of Dino Domain.
Stupid, the pig thought. He had gotten so caught up in his affair with the bear and bird that he had forgotten all about the rest of Timber Island. While he was busy fighting them, the rest of the inhabitants had time to retreat from Taj Mountain and retrieve their airplanes from Dino Domain. And now, they were all firing upon Wizpig with missiles unceasingly. The giant pig tried his best to swat the planes out of the sky but it was no use. There were way too many of them. After dozens and dozens of missiles blasting his body, he finally held his arms up in surrender.
“Okay worms, you win. I give up,” he said and bowed his battered and bruised head. Taj flew up to face him and held his arms out before the pigs overly large snout.
“I ban you back to the planet from which you came, non-friend,” said Taj and blasted him with a white light that sent the pig on a one-way course back to the planet that he had just left. The genie then flew down to Banjo and Kazooie and used his powers to heal their wounds and prepared to use the same maneuver to send them back home. “Thank you friends for saving us all.”
“Guh-huh! Not a problem at all, Mr. Taj. We’re sorry to have to leave so soon, but Tooty is out visiting with our friend Bottles and we forgot to feed poor Roysten again,” Banjo stated whilst shaking his head. Taj and company nodded their understanding and waved good-bye as Banjo and Kazooie were transported home. Timber Island was back to normal and all of its inhabitants could once again live and race in peace.