“Okay, Singalong. We’ve got it,” said Kazooie after King Jingaling was finished telling Banjo and Kazooie a bit of dreadful news.

“It’s Jingaling…” the King Jinjo muttered under his breath while tapping his yellow fingers on his throne impatiently.

“Kazooie! Don’t make fun of poor Dingaling!” Banjo stated and Jingaling shifted uneasily, his golden crown tilting sideways.

“It’s Jinga…” the Jinjo started but was interrupted by a loud-mouthed bird.

“I only thought that’s what his name is, goofball! But Dingaling? I don’t think so Banjo. How about Dingalong?” the breegull asked after rudely interrupting the bright yellow Jinjo King.

“It’s JINGALING!!” the King suddenly yelled, irritated beyond control by the duo’s inability to pronounce his name correctly and properly. The bear and bird snapped to attention and shifted uncomfortably when they saw King Jingaling’s yellow knuckles whitening from clinching the arms of his throne so intently.

“Ahem… now… if you would please go see Master Jiggywiggy and gather what news you can, I would be ever so grateful,” King Jingaling asked politely, feeling a wee bit guilty over his sudden outburst; and then even moreso when he witnessed the speed in which the bear and bird duo left his throne room. But oh well, he thought, they would be properly rewarded once their mission was complete.

——————————————————————————–

Banjo and Kazooie were awakened early that morning by a bright blue Jinjo sent to them by King Jingaling. The Jinjo King bid that the bear and bird duo come to him, for something awefully dreadful had happened that begged of their immediate presence. So the duo left at once and followed Jingaling’s trusted ally back to the Isle ‘O’ Hags where the King resided in his golden throne room.

When staning in the presence of the King Jinjo, Jingaling didn’t hesitate for a moment to inform the duo of his present dilemma. Toots had run away! Two years ago. after the downfall of Gruntilda the Witch’s reign by Banjo and Kazooie aided by the Jinjonator, King Jingaling had went in search of a “pet” that could remain by his side. Using his special powers, he warped from one world to another in Gruntilda’s Lair until he found Toots in a pyramid at Gobi’s Valley. Being wealthy as he is (he is the King of all things Jinjo afterall), he managed to purchase Toots from her current owner at that time, Ruby the Snake Charmer. Though Ruby demanded a rather hefty price–one thousand Doubloons, ten rubies, and a golden silhouette–Jingaling willingly paid the price.

An immediate bond began to grow between Jingaling and Toots, and throughout their two years together they had become the closest of friends. Jingaling constantly talked to Toots (who could only respond with a snort or squeak since she is incapable of speaking), both played several game together, and even went on their own dangerous adventures! So of course, when Jingaling awoke this very morning and Toots wasn’t in her usual location nor anywhere to be found for that matter, the King Jinjo became distrought with worry and sent his blue Jinjo messenger to bring Banjo and Kazooie to his aid.

So now, here they were, the bear and bird duo drawn away from their peaceful home in Spiral Mountain to once again serve the dire need of another friend.

——————————————————————————–

Banjo and Kazooie decided to visit their good friend Bottles the Mole first and foremost since they hadn’t a clue as to where their search should begin. And Bottles DOES live closer to Jingaling afterall; perhaps Toots had even detoured through Bottles’ house. Thus, a few minutes after their departure from Jingaling’s, they both stood before Bottles’ door knocking repetitively.

Banjo was excited immensely at the prospect of seeing Bottles’ wife and kids again. The last time he and Kazooie visited was after Botteles had been blasted by Gruntilda using Mingella and Blobelda’s (Grunty’s evil sisters) B.O.B to such the life force out of poor Bottles. They had tried visiting on another occasion not too long ago, but had unfortanately ended up lost in Flibbit Forest and fighting for their lives against King Flibbity Flibbit.

Kazooie on the otherhand, wasn’t quite sure of her feeling toward returning here again. She could entertain herself for a while with her crude jokes toward the Mole family, but Banjo was sure to spoil it as the party pooper, as usual. Her thoughts of the coming visit swiftly concluded, though, when the door swung open.

“Banjo? And… and… Chicken Legs, isn’t it?” said a certain mole when she saw the duo standing in her doorway. It was Mrs. Bottles, Bottles’ wife. She was a bit hefty and wore glasses similar to the those of her husbands. Around her waist was wrapped a bright pink apron that smelled of Banjo’s favorite food: fish!

“Would you two like to come inside and dine with us? I’ve just finished cooking some fresh fish and…” Mrs. Bottles began but was cut-off short when Banjo zipped past her and seated himself at the dinner table where Bottles stared at him–fork and knife in hand–with a stunned expression on his face.

“Nice of you to drop in Banjo…” said Bottles, appearing more than a little sour at the bear’s sudden intrusion. The beefy mole had intended on feasting on more than his share of food this evening, for his wife had prepared a very fine meal: fresh fried fish, honey suckle straight from a Zubba’s nest with no preservatives, and some finely boiled Collywobble with Topper Juice. So Bottles was quite disgusted at the prospect of sharing his food with another besides his wife. And then it happened. Coming from the entrance of his home following on the heels of his wife, was how he dreaded to see most of all: Kazooie! Bottles was immediately overwhelmed with disgust. So disgusted, in fact, that a little red tail suddenly grew from his rump that he had to quickly conceal underneath the table.

“Chicken legs, goggle boy? It’s KAZOOIE and don’t you forget it!” started Kazooie as she sat her feathery rump in the chair next to her furry partner. Bottles squeezed the fork and knife in his hands tightly; his lower body turned blood red. Kazooie started to make another sly remark but was interrupted when Mrs. Bottles came carrying a platter with four plates of food.

“So what brings you two out this way, Banjo?” asked Mrs. Bottles while she handed the duo and her husband their food. She then sat herself down at her proper place at the table.

“Well Mrs. Bottles, we’re searching for a little creature named Toots. She recently ran away from King… uhh… Dingadong’s and we’ve been entrusted to find her for him,” answered Banjo and tossed his entire fish in his mouth and swallowed it whole.

“Yes, yes, something small and pink with a long snout passed through here earliy this morning. It even sucked up a piece of my husband’s sausage on the way,” she said, chuckling a bit at how upset that had made Bottles. Bottles did not want to be reminded of that incident though; his back was now red as well.

“Yeah, that’s her alright! So hey! Where’s the little squirts at? I feel sorry for the poor little goomers being fathered by goggle boy here! Hee hee!” Kazooie insulted once more causing Bottles to start shaking with rage. Then, before Mrs. Bottles could do anything to prevent it, Bottles was floating above the dinner table entirely red with a pitchfork in his right hand and two little pointy horns protruding from his head. His life threatening horrific glares sent shivers flowing through the duo’s spines.

“Gulp! He’s so evil…” muttered Banjo to Kazooie and started for the exit at the other end of the house opposite to the way they had previously entered. Kazooie followed his lead but, unlike Banjo, barely exited alive for Bottles’ pitchfork nearly beheaded her scrony neck when it soared over her head and stuck squarely into a wall. Luckily though, she survived unscathed and was reunited with her furry partner at the Wooded Hollow.

“Thanks for abandoning me to that deviled beetle breath alone, Banjo!” Kazooie squawked sarcastically. She has disliked Bottles from the very first time the pair met two years ago. Banjo and Kazooie had just left their home to investigate Tooty’s disappearance and there was Bottles to explain the details. Had Bottles not, during that explanation, ridiculed the breegull, then perhaps the relationship between the two would be different. She did have to admit, however, that no matter how much she disliked Bottles, she found his devilish side to be much worse. So, of course, she rather upset at Banjo for dashing away like a yellow bear and leaving her to cope with the devilish fiend.

“I’m sorry Kazooie. But…” Banjo began apologizing but Kazooie wouldn’t have it.

“Don’t apologize to me, yellow belly!” Kazooie gawked. “Let’s just hurry up and find that little sausage sucker. I want to get back home and play some more Super Jinjo Bros. II on my new Flame Boy DS.”

“Okay, Kazooie. Then I think we should go visit Mr. Jiggywiggy. He may know where to find Toots,” Banjo stated and Kazooie nodded in agreement.

The pair didn’t have to travel far, but the short distance still had a few minor enemies that were easily disposed of with a couple of Rat-a-tat-raps. Then they were there. Standing directly in front of the one of the first locales they had to visit on their quest to restore Bottles’ body: Jiggywiggy’s Temple.

Most of the studies admitted that stress, depression, diseases, over medication count to be the threat to cause sexual disorder in men. canadian viagra sales I managed to cope up with it and stopped thinking about viagra pfizer suisse that incident. Always take this pill with water as it will help the gelatin to dissolve properly and the super active viagra pill can show its effect sooner. Furthermore, purchase viagra from canada uniqkey%.html online is actually be the best likely anti-impotence drugs that has been invented to treat erectile dysfunction and other such issues. As always, one of Jiggywiggy’s Disciples stood guard by the temple’s entrance, disallowing entrance to anyone who didn’t have the requested amount of Jiggies for entry.

“Hey Jiggy head! Let us in!” Kazooie squawked, still a bit upset at her fight with Devil Bottles. “We need to see Jiggywiggy!”

“Ahh chosen ones. I regret to announce that Master Jiggywiggy is currently absent. He consumed one too many Yumblie-Macs at McJiggy’s and became overwhelmed with McJiggyitis. However, he was expecting your arrival and left me an ancient Jiggy Ball to aid you in your quest,” the Jiggywiggy disciple informed them, and then he withdrew the Jiggy Ball. It was approximately the size of Banjo’s head and was sperically shaped with Jiggy characteristics: golden and shiny. “Stare into the Jiggy Ball and you will see that which you seek,” the disciple explained.

Banjo and Kazooie’s eyes gazed deep and intentively into the Jiggy Ball until swirls of unclear images blocked by a hazy mist began to form. When the mist cleared, the ancient Jiggy Ball did indeed provide for the bear and bird what they were searching for: Toots! The little pink creature was deep inside of Mayahem Temple in a particular chamber that the duo recognized: Targitzan’s Really Sacred Chamber. And surrounding Toots, prepared to attace, was a band of Moggies wielding vicious clubs with razor sharp spikes protruding from the ends of them.

“Gulp! How dangerous!”, stated Banjo when he saw Toots barely sidestep a powerful downswing of a club.

“Dangerous smangerous, We’ve handled much worse than that scaredy bear. Now stop being a coward and let’s go rescue Toots before she becomes a Moggy dinner delight,” suggested Kazooie, inputting some eagerness in Banjo to save the life of yet another in jeopardy. So the duo thanked the Jiggywiggy Disciple for his help and went to Mayahem Temple where lied the final part of their mission.

While inside, Kazooie had no choice but to abandon the confinement of the blue backpack and allow Banjo to hold her as a gun: one paw holding her legs and the other wrapped around her feathery throat. It was all part of an age old curse that Targitzan placed on the temple should a bear and bird ever decide to infiltrate it.

“Can’t breathe… can’t breathe…” gasped Kazooie whose throat was being squeezed a bit too tightly. Banjo, as dense as ever, didn’t even realize it until his breegull friend’s neck started to go limp.

The pair continued their trek through the temple, meeting no resistance until they eventually found the familiar setting of the REally Sacred Chamber. The band of Moggies–now with more recruits–were still attempting to pound Toots into oblivion, just as the duo had saw earlier via the Jiggy Ball. It seemed that Banjo and Kazooie had arrived just in time…

——————————————————————————–

Toots was quite a nimble creature and could easily dodge the Moggies’ brutal clubs for several hours. She could have easily escaped as well; but Toots hadn’t come this far just to abandon her mission. The object she was after–the Golden Quill–sat high up on a newly constructed column in the center of the chamber. The feather was too hight for Toots to reach or to even suck in. Had King Jingaling been with her though, he would have lifted her above his head allowing her to suck it into her grasp. Unfortunately though, Jingaling wasn’t with her and too many Moggies were about for her to consider another way of reaching the object.

Then, close to the entrance of the chamber, Toots heard a crackling sound and turned to see several Moggies frantically dashing about, their bodies on fire. Beyond the flames and now scorched corpses stood Banjo and Kazooie; but only for a moment. They were quickly back in motion when several Moggies nearly whacked the duo senseless with their clubs. But the pair were no novices in battle and sidestepped the swings and then counterattacked with several more Fire Eggs that burned their opponents to a crisp.

Toots was mightily impressed. Never before had she seen the bear and bird in combat and regretted it so. But now wasn’t the time to be admiring their fighting prowess. There were still a few Moggies near to the Golden Quill and she wasn’t about to let Banjo and Kazooie have all the fun! It was time for her to fight!

With speed that surpassed the imagination of those few Moggies next to the quill, Toots sped toward them so quickly she seemed to be nothing more than a pink blur. WHAM! Her massive charge knelled a Moggie in the gut, bending it over in pain. Then, with a powerful suck beyond belief, the little pink creature sucked the Moggie face-first to the ground. The other three–quite frightened and amazed–charged Toots with their clubs raised high, ready to strike. But like Banjo and Kazooie, she was no novice to battle having been trained by the best among the Jinjos: both her best friend, King Jingaling, and the Jinjo entity, the Jinjonator. If only those last remaining Moggies had known… then perhaps they would have directed their attacks toward the bear and bird instead!

When the Moggies reached their target, they found themselves to be far too inexperienced to defeat the likes of such a mighty little combatant. With incredible pace, Toots dashed beneath one of their legs as another swung its club in a downward arching motion that connected with the other’s groin. The clubbed ally was filled with inthinkable pain and soon collapsed to the floor unconcious. Toots then used her sucking ability to latch herself to the floor with her body held up with nothing more than her snout she used her moment to rock herself back and forth and then launched herself into the air, just high enough to get attached to a Moggie’s face. The Moggie started flailing wildly swinging its club blindly and, just as its partner was swinging its club toward Toots, swung in the very same direction unknowingly. Toots, quick as ever, foresaw the mishap and dived off the Moggie’s face just as both clubs connected with one another’s head. The Moggies were now defeated.

——————————————————————————–

“Squawww! Just as easy as I remembered them to be, furball! Could’ve taken them all with one wing tied behind my back!” gloated Kazooie, attempting to credit herself for all the work. All fo the Moggies had been defeated save the few cowardly ones that fled for their lives. So the pair decided now to get Toots and return her back to Jingaling right away.

When they saw her, Toots was using her Snout Fling maneuver (the move she used to launch herself onto the face of the Moggie) to try and reach the Golden Quill; unfortunately, the feather was just too high. So when the duo reached Toots’ location, Kazooie scooped her up in her beak and Banjo whonked Kazooie on the back of the neck causing the breegull to shoot Toots up to the top of the column. Toots wrapped the object snuggly with her snout and dived down to the bottom. It was time for Toots to return to her rightful place beside King Jingaling.

——————————————————————————–

“Ahhh… the Golden Quill. A family heirloom that has been passed down from generation to generation. I thought it lost forever…” explained Jingaling after the duo returned Toots to him. “So THAT’S why you went back into the temple,” he also said, this time his words directed toward Toots.

“What’s so important about a stupid feather anyway, Pingapong?” Kazooie asked rudely.

“This Golden Quill was used centuries ago to sign the do*****ents that ended the great Jinjo Wars. Since then, it has been passed down from generation to generation until my time to protect this precious item finally came,” Jingaling explained while staring at the feather intently.

“But how did Moggies get it, Mr. Jingles?” asked Banjo curiously.

“Well…Toots and I decided to investigate that Mayahem Temple as one of our many adventures a few years ago. During the investigation, we met a great foe that was beyond our strength at that time: Targitzan. Unfortunately, in our flight to escape the Really Sacred Chamber, the Golden Quill was shot from my crown by one of Targitzan’s many darts. Toots insisted upon retrieving it before we left, but I refused. It wasn’t worth Toots possibly losing her life.

“Thus, when Toots learned a few months ago that Targitzan had been annihilated by you two, she had apparantly been planning a return trip to Mayahem Temple to secretly retrieve the Golden Quill.

“Now… that that’s outta the way, on to your reward!” the Jinjo King reached behind his throne and revealed a bright red sack. “As it turned out, I had a backstash of ten Jiggies hidden underneath my throne. They’re no use to me, so here! Take them as payment for bringing my Toots back home!”

“Jiggies! What do you think WE need Jiggies for Dingajing?!” Kazooie shouted angrily.

“Kazooie!! Be nice to Mr. Jinjolong!” Banjo told his partner. She ignored his comment and continued ridiculing the King Jinjo.

“Why not birdseed or a life-long supply of Honey Snackers? Instead, all we get is more cheesy Jiggies. What kind of cheap King are you?!” King Jingaling’s yellow face began to turn red as his eyes glared mighty evilly at the insulting breegull. Banjo, quick to respond, pulled a maneuver hd hadn’t performed in quite some time: the Breegull Bash. Kazooie was yanked from the backpack unexpectedly and bashed to the ground three times. SQUAW-HAAA… SQUAW-HAAA… SQUAW-HAAA… Banjo then returned his unconsious friend to the backpack, grabbed the red sack of Jiggies, and told Jingaling and Toots bye before leaving the Throne Room. It would be a peaceful and quiet trip home.

THE END

By Daniel Durock

Actor. Writer. Gamer

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