EXCLUSIVE: Banjo-Kazooie: The Series Episode 18- Chipper the Chipmunk


“Eee eee eee eee eee eee!” comes the sounds from a little chipmunk within his tree home in Spiral Mountain. “Eee eee eee eee eee eee!”

“CHIPPER!” yells his mother when she sees what he is doing to her favorite rock. “You stop that right now! This very instant!”

“Almost done, almost done, almost done. Eee eee eee eee eee eee! Eeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeee! Ahhh… whew! That was good, that was good!” says Chipper as he finishes up with the rock. He wipes himself off with a leaf and struts over to his mother. He looks up at her with a kinky grin on his face.

“Chipper… I have told you a dozen times not to do that nasty stuff with MY rock. Why don’t you go find your OWN special rock and pleasure yourself with it any time you want,” declares Mrs. Chipmunk. Chipper places a tiny paw on his chin and thinks.

“Good idea, good idea. I’ll do that. Yeah, yeah, I’ll do that!” he claims and, without any hesitation, takes off through the winding tunnels of his home to the world outside.

“Ruuuuuuuun Chipper ruuuuuuuun! You find that rock, Chipper! You can do it son, you can do it!” his mother yells as he dashes rapidly through the tunnels.

Chipper frolics through the fields of Spiral Mountain in search of the rock love of his life. He has pleasured himself with his mother’s rock for many weeks now; ever since he entered his puberty stage. And now, tired of being fussed at, is out on an adventure to find and obtain his own rock.

While searching, he comes across Banjo and Kazooie holding sticks playing with a Gnawty beaver. Chipper grins evilly with a kinky look in his eyes seeing Kazooie as a wide-open target. He runs madly with incredible speed straight for her.

“No Banjo, you idiot! You don’t hit the beaver in THAT head! You spread his legs open wide, take the stick, and whack him right in the…”

“Eee eee eee eee eee eee!” squeaks Chipper from atop of Kazooie’s back. “Eee eee eee eee eee eee!”

“Sqwaaawk! What the… Hey Banjo! Get this little rodent off of me!” screams Kazooie, flapping her wings madly trying to shake the chipmunk off her back.

“Guh huh! Guh huh!” chuckles Banjo. “Looks like you’ve made a new friend, Kazooie! Guh huh!”

“Eee eee eee eee eee eee!” continues Chipper, as he holds a firm grip and keeps on with his deed. “Almost done, almost done, almost done.”

“BANJO! Hit the dratted varmint with the stick!”

“Eeeeeeee eeeeeeee!” squeals chipper, wipes himself off on the breegulls back, and dives away just as Banjo’s stick comes crashing down. “Squaaaaaawk!” yells Kazooie and falls to the ground unconscious. “Heh heh!” laughs Chipper and leaves the duo and beaver behind.

The naughty little chipmunk continues his search for the rock. Along the way, he notices a dirt mound moving slightly just ahead. It is one of Bottles’ molehills with the struggling mole attempting to climb out. Chipper smiles and takes up the opportunity for some more fun.

“Eee eee eee eee eee eee! Almost done, almost done, almost done! Eee eee eee eee eee eee!”

“Hey! What’s that on top of my mound?” questions Bottles and pokes his eye through the mound’s peep hole.

“Eeeeeeee eeeeeeeee!” finishes Chipper. “That was good. Yes, yes, very good.”

“Ahhhhhh!” screams Bottles when he is squirted in the eye. “It buuuuurns!” The ejaculated mole tumbles back down the tunnel he has wilting in pain. Chipper brushes himself against the mound, laughs madly at his deed, and leaves to search for his rock once again.

Chipper runs all about Spiral Mountain still in search of the perfect rock. Eventually, in the distance, he notices a giant heart-shaped rock. The perverted little chipmunk grins widely in shock and awe. “That rock will be perfect. Absolutely perfect!” he exclaims and dashes for it hurriedly.

One the way, he halts by a tree where Mumbo Jumbo is sitting looking at the newest edition of Hag Lesbo Magazine. “Ah ah ah ah! Left hand do good job! Ah ah ah ah!” says the shaman. Chipper chuckles and continues his way toward the rock leaving Mumbo stroking himself underneath the tree. Chipper soon makes it within several feet of his destination when Banjo and Kazooie suddenly pop out from behind the rock. Banjo laughs at the appearance of the little chipmunk and Kazooie scowls at Chipper angrily with a large knot protruding forth from her head.

“You dirty little rodent! Look at this knot on my head! And look at what you did to my back!” shouts Kazooie and twists around. On her upper back is a very noticeable white stain. “But you know what you filthy little varmint? I’m a forgiving breegull. So go ahead and have at it at your precious rock!” says Kazooie, and snickers under her breath. Banjo covers his mouth holding in his laughter. Chipper peers at them both suspiciously, walks past them, and dives onto the rock.

“Eee eee eee eee eee eee!” the chipmunk begins. “Eee eee eee eee eee eee! Almost done, almost done, almost done. Eee eee eee eee eee eee! Eeeeeeeeee Eeeeeeeeee!” he finishes and wipes himself off on the rock. He then climbs upon it proud of his deed and of his accomplishment of finally finding his own rock. A very nice heart-shaped one on top of that! Then, without being able to hold it in any longer, Banjo and Kazooie both burst out laughing.

“Squaw-ha-ha! You idiot, that was a sexually transmitted diseased rock! Hee hee!” laughs the breegull. Moments later, Chipper squeals and falls over dead. “Guh huh! We got him Kazooie! Guh huh!” states Banjo chuckling. Kazooie pats him on the back and motions for him to follow her back home. But they both suddenly halt in place.

“Eee eee!” comes a sound from behind them. “Eee eee!” comes yet another sound from their left. “Eee eee! Eee eee! Eee eee! Eee eee!” the sounds are coming from all around them. Seconds later, over a dozen little chipmunks appear from surrounding bushes.

“Gulp!” sounds Banjo worriedly. “We’re in trouble!” he cries and starts to make a run for it with Kazooie taking the same action… too late. In seconds all chipmunks dive upon them both. “Eee eee eee eee eee eee eee eee eee eee! We’re almost done, we’re almost done!” they all chant simultaneously. “Eee eee eee eee eee eee eee eee eee eee! Eeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeee!” they all cry as they finish up with their deed. Each chipmunk wipes itself off on the bear and bird’s bodies and start laughing madly at them. Both Banjo and Kazooie are fully colored white and extremely sticky. The chipmunks continue laughing, pick up their dead friend, and wander off into the sunset.

Kazooie glances over at Banjo and shakes her head. “And I thought YOUR stuff was sticky!” she says.