“Banjie! Banjie! I wanna go on an adventure!” Tooty yelled excitedly at her older brother, who was still sleeping heavily in his cozy bed. “C’mon Banjie! Wake up!”

“Yeah furface, I want go get in on some action too. Been a while since I’ve rat-a-tat-rapped some monsters!” Kazooie said as she rubbed her feathery wings across the bear’s face.

“Awww….”, Banjo groaned and rolled over onto his side, facing the opposite direction of the breegull and cub. Tooty looked to the floor disappointed. This was the third day in a row that Banjo had ignored her pleas for an adventure and she was beginning to wonder why she even bothered. Roysten glanced in her direction and decided he was fed up with Banjo’s laziness and took a bit of action of his own. He swam to the far end of his fish bowl and swam with all of his might up and out of his bowl to come crashing back down, causing quite an enormous splash for one so tiny. The water splattered across the room and soaked the lazy honey bear. Banjo was up in a flash, oblivious to what happened. Oblivious until he saw the scowl on the little golden fish’s face.

“Now you listen here you big oaf! Tooty is your little sister, and it’s your job to take care of her. She’s begged you for three bloody days for a simple little adventure and by golly, you’re going to take her on one! So grab your dratted backpack and that bird of yours and get out of this house before I come out of this fish bowl and beat you silly with my golden fins!” Roysten screamed. Banjo looked to Tooty and Kazooie who simply shrugged and nudged him toward the door.

Spiral Mountain was just as peaceful as it usually is, with nothing seemingly out of place. The weather was bright and sunny with a nice chill breeze, a few Toppers running amock, Bottles talking to Kazooie. Yep, all was as it should be. WAIT! Bottles talking to Kazooie?! How could Bottles and Kazooie be carrying on a conversation when Kazooie was standing between Banjo and Tooty, a good one hundred yards from their location?

“Gulp! Somethings not right here…” Banjo said, stating the obvious. Kazooie looked up to Banjo and shook her feathery and then slapped him in the neck.

“You think, furball?! It’s an imposter! Let’s get her!” The feisty breegull jumped into the blue backpack and the trio charged up the hill toward Bottles and the imposter bird. The mole saw the trio coming and couldn’t believe his eyes when he saw Kazooie’s head protruding forth from the bright blue backpack. In fact, he removed his glasses, cleaned them, and put them back on expecting one of the two breegulls to be gone. Unfortunately, that just wasn’t the case. Bottles looked on in disbelief, glancing back and forth from the Kazooie before him and the Kazooie looking rather angry in the backpack. Two Kazooie’s was just too much for him to handle. He sucked in his breath and then ran away to the nearest molehill, which he burrowed down in as quickly as possible and dug and dug and dug until he reached the safety of his home in the Isle ‘O Hags.

The now lone red breegull that was talking with Bottles also saw the trio coming and her eyes nearly bulged from her sockets. “Brrreee!” she squealed and took off running in the opposite direction, attempting to make an escape. But the trio was just too close for her to go very far so she did all she knew to do: hid behind one of the Quarry. Banjo, Kazooie, and Tooty arrived to her position very soon afterwards to find the breegull trembling and terrified.

“What’s the big idea, you! There’s only enough room for one breegull around here, and her name’s Kazooie!” shouted Kazooie angrily at the assumed poser and started to pelt her with an egg. But Tooty intervened by diving in front of the breegull, insisting that Kazooie take into consideration the current posture of the helpless bird. The young cub looked to the gull helplessly and asked her to introduce herself.

“Katooie! Brreee! Breaa braa braaee brrrreeeeeeeee!” she uttered, unable to speak any other language besides breegull. Tooty looked to Kazooie for the answer, who suddenly dove from the backpack, swooped up Katooie into her wings, and took off running.

“Guh-hey! Where’re you going, Kazooie?” Banjo yelled after her. “To Breegull Beach! The breegulls are in danger of extinction!” Kazooie yelled back in reply and fastened her pace. Banjo snatched up Tooty and placed her in the backpack and followed after Kazooie in fast pursuit.

Breegull Beach was literally torn asunder when they arrived. Feather’s were strewn across the beach, the water was oily, deep chasms were dug throughout the sand… nothing appeared the same. Katooie tore herself from Kazooie’s wings and motioned for the trio to follow her. They didn’t hesitate a moment, and followed the breegulls lead. A few minutes later, they were all standing before the deepest chasm they had ever seen. Inside, at the very bottom, were hundreds of breegulls, their wings tied to their backs by chains to prevent them from flying away. But the breegulls wasn’t what caught the trio’s attention the most. It was the other figure that stood amongst the endangered birds: an enourmous Gruntling of epic proportions holding a breegull by its feet.
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“Breeeeeeguuuull BASH!” the Gruntling screamed in its deep voice as it slammed the helpless bird against the ground. It then threw the bird’s now lifeless body high into the air and opened its amazing big mouth to swallow the bird whole as it plunged inside. One-by-one, it continued the process, resounding that awful scream and then slamming the life out of its victims.

Kazooie and the other breegull watched on in awe, paralyzed at the horrific seen. Luckily though, Banjo and Tooty were there to bring them back to their senses. When they did, they found two breegulls angry beyond imagination. So angry, they spread their wings and dove into the chasm without a second thought. Banjo and Tooty reached out to prevent them from making a terrible mistake, but were a bit too late. The breegull duet were already soaring down and down into the chasm and landing safely on the Gruntling’s massive shoulders; Kazooie on the right and Katooie on the left.

“Breeeeeeguuuull BASH!” the Gruntling screamed once again, but this time it dropped its prey when pain soared through its bulging arms. It glanced to its right and left shoulders to find two breegulls pecking its shoulders without a miss. “Breeeeeeguuuull’s BAD!” it yelled louder than ever and began to pound at the duet with its mighty fists. So enraged was it, that it forgot the very position of the duet’s locations. The two breegulls simply took flight when they saw the fists coming their way, and watched as they soared to the bottom of the chasm the great Gruntling fall to its knees, its own powerful fists taking it down. Now was their chance.

The slightest bit of hesitation could cost the breegull duet this battle and the many other breegulls their lives, so they quickly took aim at the Gruntling’s eyes and fired away. Two Grenade Eggs knelled their target perfectly; one in the right eye, one in the left. The Gruntling, now blinded and outraged at the sly maneuver, began to go berserk. It was upon its feet faster than Kazooie and Katooie had anticipated and pounded the chasm floor with its fists in an amazing display of strength. The ground shook violently from such a powerful hit, causing boulders to come tumbling down the chasm to fall right upon the Gruntling’s body. Even with its great size, it couldn’t survive the onslaught of boulders that crashed upon it. Luckily, Kazooie and Katooie and the other breegulls were free from harm and were now able to make their escape with no worries of being attacked. One-by-one, the breegull duet used their beaks to free the breegulls from their chains and they were all soon flying to the top of the chasm safely.

Banjo, Kazooie, and Tooty hung around Breegull Beach for a few days to aid in restoring it back to its former paradise. This was the second time over the years that it had been demolished. The first being when Gruntilda had kidnapped Kazooie and traveled back in time. She had captured all of the breegulls and transformed the beach into a world of monsters. And then most recently with the attack of the giant Gruntling, which turned out to be even worse. Though Grunty is downright evil, she never took the life of any of the breegulls like the giant Gruntling fiend. But thankfully, Kazooie and her new found friend, Katooie, defeated the evil monster and saved the lives of many breegulls that would have surely found the same fate as those that were killed before them. And now, after days of labor, the paradise that was Breegull Beach was restored.

“Brea breee braa brae brrree!” Katooie said to Kazooie and threw her wings around her, giving her a great hug. Banjo and Tooty recognized the gesture as both a thank you and good-bye. Kazooie returned the hug and shared a few words with Katooie in the breegull language and then rejoined her companions. They all waved good-bye to the breegulls one last time and began their journey home.

Tooty played her flute unceasingly all the way back to the little blue home, feeling mightliy cheerful that she finally got the adventure she had been begging for. And now that they were back to their sweet abode, she couldn’t wait to tell Roysten of their adventure. ROYSTEN!… oh no! she thought. They had all forgotten about the poor little fish. When they walked through the front door, poor Roysten was floating belly up, twitching slightly and mumbling silently to himself. “Need…food. Can’t… survive….” Banjo looked on helplessly not knowing what to think.

“Guuhh… I don’t think that’s normal.” Banjo stated stupidly, a bit shocked from Roysten’s floating body. Kazooie’s feathers ruffled at such a stupid and ignorant question and she thought about performing a bit of a ‘Banjo Bash’ on the doofus bear. But Roysten’s life was at stake here, so she hurriedly aided Tooty in reaching the fish food at the top of the cupboard so that the young cub could feed the starving fish.

Tooty poured the fish food into the fish bowl as quickly as possible and watched as Roysten consumed the food within seconds. Banjo, still appearing dumbfounded, looked on in disbelief as Roysten (his strength regained) swam out of the fish bowl and latched himself onto Banjo’s big black nose with his teeth. The furry bear fell backwards to floor sprawling in pain and screaming as Roysten bit harder and proceeded to beating him silly with his golden fins.

“Hee hee! It’s good to be home, Tooty!” chuckled Kazooie to Tooty, who was also laughing herself to death from the hilarious scene. All was as it should be in the little blue home.

THE END

By Daniel Durock

Actor. Writer. Gamer

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